The Grandparent Syndrome

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Mike and I are going on vacation together for a week and a half, without any of our boys!  It’s wild, I know, but we managed to find amazing sitters and get everything lined up.  I have mixed emotions, as any good mother would, but with 3 youngsters, finding time to be together is very important, and vital to the stability of our family.  We had originally planned to take Kayden, as he’s only 3.5 months old, but again, this trip is important for Mike and I.  Besides, so many of the things we want to do would be nearly impossible with a baby along – things like hiking, sleeping in the car, horseback riding, white water rafting etc.

Everyone we’ve told about our trip is really excited for us – all but one.  My mother-in-law is a wonderful woman, but we tend to disagree on many parenting issues.  Our relationship has always been a touch tense due to our differences, but generally we get along well and agree to disagree.  Yesterday she overstepped the boundery line though, and we’ll need to have a good talk before Mike and I leave.  We hadn’t told her that we were leaving Kayden at home, A) because it has nothing to do with her, and B) we knew she’s have a very strong negative reaction.  While on the phone with her last night, Mike let the cat out of the bag, and she lost it on him.  She insulted his parenting and questioned weather or not he even loved his sons, then she hung up on him.  Mike was cut deep by the things she said, but he doesn’t stand up for himself, so his mom doesn’t seem to realize when she’s crossing the line.  I’m generally a pretty non-aggressive person, accept when it comes to defending my family – then I tend to be…well a pit bull 🙂

I hear about the grandparent syndrome so often.  People (generally women) become grandparents, and suddenly forget that these little ones are not their children.  They raised their children already, and now it’s time to step back and shower love not judgment.

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2 responses »

    • LOL! She called and started getting emotional and such, but by the end of the conversation, she was calmer. I just don’t understand. I mean, who loves the babies more than their parents?! If we’ve made a decision regarding our children, there should be no discussion needed. It doesn’t matter why, when or how we came to the conclusions we do, but obviously we have our family’s best interest at the core of each decision. Wow is all I can say 🙂 (sigh)

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