A Selfish Martyr Mother

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As a wife and mother, my natural passion for giving and caring for others is incredibly magnified.  My family brings out the absolute best in me, and I love it!  The one thing I lack is self care.  I do what I can for myself when I can, if I have time and energy.  Two things I haven’t been taking good care of is my wisdom teeth and my thyroid glands.

I was told last year that I needed at least 2 of my wisdom teeth removed because they’re growing in crooked due to the lack of space in my mouth.  I was scheduled to get them removed, but canceled the appointment because my teeth weren’t bothering me, and I know I wouldn’t be 100% after the surgery.  I can’t ask Mike to take a day off, because he’s our only source of income.  Three days ago one of my wisdom began aching, and hasn’t stopped.  There’s definitely an infection in there, because my right jaw is sore to the touch, I can’t chew, open my mouth very far or swallow without pain.  Only now am I ready to admit that it’s time for a fix, because the pain will only get worse. martyr

For the past 7 years, my thyroid level has been stable for the most part, but in the past 2 years, my right side thyroid gland has been bothering me.  I can feel pressure on it when I turn my head to the right, and recently it’s become a bit sore and enlarged.  I’m not sure if it’s the combination of the tooth infection and gland enlargement, but the gland area has become very tender to the touch, and I’m a bit worried about that.

It’s becoming increasingly real to me that I do need to take better care of myself, because something could go seriously wrong if I don’t, and the thought of leaving my boys motherless and my dear Mike a widdow is a horrible thought.  I realize that as a mother, being overly selfless is actually selfish and lazy, and Ièm ready to change.

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